Holy Shit

As I sit here typing this post at 2 am after using Plaster Wrap to make a complete mask of my face I am filled with many, many ideas and reflections on Ana Mendieta and myself. I think before I list those, I will describe the process I performed this evening (well morning actually) to make a plaster copy of my face.

USING PLASTER WRAP FOR THE FIRST TIME

1. I opened the package and read the instructions. Instead of using petroleum jelly all over my face (which I didn't have anyway) I oped to use wet paper towels as a barrier between my skin and the plaster.
2. I cut the plaster wrap into strips. 6 strips that were 3"x 1/2" and around 8 or 10 larger strips were roughly 7" x 2 1/2 "
3. I filled my bathroom sink with warm water. (Note it was a mistake to use the sink because of the amount of clean up I had to do after I took off the mask to get all the plaster out.)
4. I wet paper towels and started applying them to my face smoothly. I made sure there were eye holes and nose holes.
5. After my face, hair, and part of my neck were covered with paper towels, I wet the first strip and applied it to my nose. (an interesting feeling the begin the mummification process on yourself alive and alone in my bathroom at 1 am)
6. I continued wetting and applying the plaster wrap to my face, ensuring that nose holes were clear. (no suffocation tonight please)
7. When it was time to shut my eyes, I covered them with paper towels first and then put a wetted plaster strip over them, completing the process of wrapping my face.
8. Feeling my way out of the bathroom, I came into my living room to lay on the floor and wait for the plaster to dry.

I really had no idea how long I was laying there because I attempted to enter into a meditative space. It was then that I gained many visceral reactions to what I have been reading about Ana Mendieta for the past two days, my project for visual images class that will grow out of this research and experience, and what process I will continue with this particular mask.


ANA MENDIETA

No wonder she documented her projects on film and thanks to the universe she did it. After tonight, I have a more full understanding of what she means in the following sentence from an artist statement: "I am overwhelmed by the feeling of having been cast from the womb (nature). My art is the way I reestablish the bonds that tie me to the universe." (Viso, 47) Olga Viso goes on in her essay to point out that Mendieta was deeply moved by Octavio Paz's writing that this artist statement liberally borrows some of its language.

I'm definitely borrowing from Ana Mendieta tonight. The experience of lying on the floor with all ability to see and speak taken away from myself by myself combined with the heightened senses of touch due to the wet plaster and hearing because it is the only other sense I have left to perceive this world made for a highly spiritual experience. When looking at the stills of her work it is evident that a truly spiritual thing is happening when Ana Mendieta creates. When one does something to themselves as a sacrifice to make art; a bigger connection is made to the earth and the universe. I don't know how else to explain it. My weight was more real. My hearing was more real. I had to quiet myself to listen to what was going on within me and without. I thought I would be claustrophobic under the plaster, and I was for a few seconds, but then I let myself quiet down and begin to absorb. There is a power in that quiet that allows the mind to begin to create for itself and it got me to thinking about how to go about this project for visual images.


FULL BODY FRONTAL CAST

So I've been kicking this idea around my head for couple of days and talking about it with trusted fellow artist and friends. This is what came through my head as I lay on my living room floor...a brief outline of what I think I may do for this project. (It could change, who knows?):

Lamentation
1. I want to create a frontal body cast that will be attached to a canvas, painted with gesso completely white. On that, I want to inscribe the names of Iraq soldiers who have died leading out of the tear ducts going down the body, out onto the canvas, over the frame, out onto the walls, down onto the floor and leading out out out until all the names have been written.
2. Then I want to inscribe hundreds of times "Unknown Iraqis" all over my body and face in Henna. I want to create a piece of clothing that is a black censor bar for my breasts, butt, and vagina to wear and take photos everyday to document the disappearance of unknown Iraqis.
3. This will take help. I need at least three people to help me with the body cast because it will be a long process I will be in full mummy mode against a wall. True to Mendieta's practice, I will digitally video record the entire process of having myself plastered. I need someone to operate the camera and guide the process after I have been completely covered. Someone with grace to help me cover myself with wet paper towels without tearing them would be wonderful and then another individual to help to the actual process of plastering.
4. I will need to be in a very individually quiet place. I may need music to help me with this.
5. I should be able to do all of the prep work myself - cutting the plaster strips and mapping out the process for my fellow artists who I will lovingly ask to collaborate with me.
6. Materials: Paper towels, a bucket, plaster strips, plastic drop cloth, camera (video and photo), ample amounts of Henna, black duck tape for the censor clothing
7. My hope is to build a huge box that has the plaster casting with text on one side and a video player embedded on the other, with text going all over. This box will be in the middle of the room. The outer edge of the room will be all of the fading photos. I will wear the black censor clothing and walk in circles around the canvas box.


CONTINUING THIS EXPERIMENT

With this face plaster cast I want to create a sculpture/painting that comes off the board. I will attach with more plaster strips the mask to a foam core board or canvas. Then I will gesso over it as experimentation for this possible Lamentation. I don't know what comes next after the gesso with this experiment, but I will see. I'm letting myself have the permission and freedom to let the art go where it wants to go.

I'm a little uncertain, but although their lies some trepidation in the uncertainty I am finding there is true liberation on that edge.

I will post photos of the mask before I attach it to the board tomorrow. I'm exhausted.